Aperture Plasmids Ch 3

"Oh, this is bad," Wheatley whined, his forehead back in the lab breaking into a sweat. "So very, very bad…I thought that we'd disposed of that stuff already!"

Chell knelt down and sifted through the wrecked crate, pulling free a sheet of paper that served as the instructions for this 'Combustible Lemonade' that had her companion so worried.

"From the Rhapsody Labs: Combustible Lemonade

Introduction: When life gives you lemons, don't just make lemonade! Make Combustible Lemonade! Our engineers have painstakingly created luscious lemons perfect for all your incendiary needs, but why stop there? We took the next step for your convenience and carefully squeezed our lemons and thus this delightfully flammable drink was born!

NOTICE: Rhapsody Labs are not responsible for any injury that occurs as a direct or indirect result of our Combustible Lemonade. USE AT YOUR OWN RISK AND THE RISK OF THOSE AROUND YOU.

Uses:
1) Burning down structures for the purposes of demolition (or fun).
2) Burning down your enemies ( Tip: houses make for exceptional kindling to heighten the effect of the lemonade).
3) Starting bonfires, campfires, fireplaces, pyres, and forest fires.
4) Fourth of July festivities ( Tip: try adding fireworks to a punch bowl of our lemonade, it's a blast!).
5) April Fool's Day pranks ( Tip: simply pour a glass of our lemonade and present to your target!).

Instructions::
1) Carefully uncap the bottle. Contents are under pressure. DO NOT SHAKE BEFORE OPENING. OR AFTER. DO NOT SHAKE THE LEMONADE AT ANY TIME.
2) Carefully pour the lemonade onto the surface* you wish to set ablaze.

* Note that the only surface that does not instantaneously combust when in contact with the lemonade is glass. This makes bottling possible and such uses as our holiday suggestions. If you are attempting to burn down a structure made entirely of glass, simply rent or purchase a wrecking ball and crane instead.

PRODUCT CONTAINS TRACE AMOUNTS OF ADAM, NAPALM AND NITROGLYCERIN."

She had to skim the sheet a second time to be sure she'd read it correctly before standing, shoving it toward Wheatley with a demanding expression. He startled out of his tangent and managed to look sheepish.

"Ah, well that…that's why I'm so worried," he explained helplessly. "My boss, the guy who used to run this place, was a hot-head named Cave Johnson. And one day, while he was dying of Moon-paint poisoning, he demanded that Life couldn't give him lemons. One thing lead to another and he ordered the scientists to develop combustible lemons. So they did and we had an orchard of lemon trees, but no use for them. They ended up turning them into lemonade so they'd stop dropping off the trees and setting fire to the Bio-Sphere, hoping they could market it as a more friendly version of nitro. We were supposed to either ship that stuff to Rapture or dump it in the deep-sea trench but, ah, it doesn't look like we got around to it and…now the Splicers found it."

Chell crumpled up the instructions and tossed the ball lightly at the core with an exasperated sigh: could this facility get any more ridiculous? Wheatley flinched and babbled on with an almost apologetic tone.

"A-anyway, we'll just have to be careful not to trip over any bottle of that stuff along the way. But if we do find anyone waving around a bottle of lemonade, well…resist the urge to drink any. So don't lick the paint, no lemonade. Should be golden!"

Not paying much attention to him at this point, Chell stepped away from the door to take in the vast Bio-Sphere. The floor beneath her appeared to be red brick that wrapped around against the wall and crossed through the middle of the circular area, leaving four segments of artificially watered grass lawns where various types of plants were grown. Toward the north-west she could see the lemon trees, several of them having been scorched badly by their own fruit. The south-western segment seemed to yield an overgrown garden of potatoes, tomatoes, corn and beans.  To the left of the lemon trees in the northern end was a field of wheat and sugar cane; the last segment, which was right before them, held a handmade lake with massive fish that Chell assumed had been encouraged by unnatural means. The beams supporting the thick glass panes of the dome were covered with thorny vines baring breathtaking, luminescent roses in every color of the rainbow. Crisscrossing overhead were numerous catwalks and pipes for the irrigation system that seemed to still be working, as the plants were all quite lively; the only real sign of neglect was the lack of pruning to keep them uniform.

Chell took a deep breath and followed Wheatley's track, heading for the hatch door she spotted in the north. Realizing that his companion was leaving without him, he whizzed after her frantically.

"H-hey, don't go off on your own!" he scolded her, earning a glare from over her shoulder. "I--you might get lost without me! And then we'd have no chance of getting out of here if we're both too busy trying to find one anoth--"

He trailed off as Chell stopped suddenly, her gaze rising to the catwalks above them and her wrench gripped so tightly that he could see her knuckles shining white under her skin. Wheatley followed her scanning with his own, wondering what had gotten her attention.

"Did you see something?" he whispered, receiving a nod. "Oh, well…is it a bad something?"

Before she could make any sort of response of her own, he got his answer. Some distance he could hear the heavy thunk of steel-toed boots on the catwalk. Chell's blood ran cold as she caught a better glimpse of the figure, its features illuminated by a nearby yellow rose. It was a man--at least he had been once--with wild black hair and dressed much like she was, but his overalls were caked with filth and dried blood. His face was a grotesque parody of a normal human's: the eyes seemed far too large for their sockets and were yellowed, the iris black as pitch. His mouth was pulled into a painfully deranged grin, crooked teeth revealed above an unkempt beard as he stopped in his tracks. Chell made note that he was carrying what looked like a piece of rusted pipe railing…that was also stained with blood, though shiny red and likely freshly spilled.

"I'm not hallucinating…" he croaked darkly, taking a step toward Chell. "I'm not…you are!"

With an inhuman shriek, he leaped down from the catwalk and onto the path, rushing headlong at the startled pair brandishing his pipe like a sword; Wheatley seemed to shrink back, his panels trembling. Chell debated fleeing for a moment before taking a battle stance, knowing that turning her back to the Splicer would only leave her more vulnerable. Meanwhile, the core above her looked around franticly for some other way out of the situation, not having expected to encounter one of the beastly former-humans so close to the last safe wing of the facility so soon.

Before he could offer any advice, Chell barely fended off a blow from the pipe, blocking it with her wrench and kicking the man in his chest, pushing him back a few feet as he stumbled. This only served to enrage him further and he charged once more, attempting to sweep the pipe at her legs. Unable to get away fast enough, it struck uselessly against the metal of her long-fall boot and the reverberation shook the pipe from his hands. As he fumbled to retrieve his weapon, Chell took off at a sprint, grabbing hold of a nearby ladder and ascended into the catwalks. Wheatley gave a cry of protest, his rail system restricted to the lower level of the Bio-Sphere.

"No no no no, don't go up there!" he implored, gazing up at her franticly. "It's not safe!"

She ignored his pleas, reaching the catwalk quickly and defiantly began kicking at the rusted metal until the ladder barely clung on. Spotting his prey getting away, the Splicer tried to clamber after her, but his weight on the compromised ladder tore it free, crashing down to the floor with a surprised growl. While he was busy trying to free himself from the tangle of metal, Chell pointed to Wheatley, then to the door in the north before taking off in that direction herself at a full sprint.

"O-oh! You want to get to the door!" he concluded, zipping along his rail toward it. "That's a good idea! Brilliant, really! We'll lock that guy in here and be on our way!"

Above in the catwalks, Cell reached another ladder that was nearest to the door, climbing down as fast as she could. Wheatley wasted no time activating the mechanisms, pistons pulling back and the gears rumbling to life. Meanwhile, the Splicer tossed the ladder off himself and was back on his feet, looking around franticly for the pair. The tell-tale clunk of the door retracting into the floor alerted him and his gaze locked onto Chell; in his eyes, she could see such a murderous, sickening hunger that her breath caught and she froze in place.

"Come on!" Wheatley pleaded, already in the next hallway, waiting on her so he could reseal the door. "I'd rather he not join us in here!"

But fear seemed to have rooted her in place, her eyes wide as the Splicer charged her at a breakneck pace.

"Would you kindly get in here?!" Wheatley tried again, his voice cracking with urgency.

This time she responded, turning on her heel and stepping through the doorway. With a sigh of relief, the core had the door sliding up again just a millisecond after she'd cleared it. Just as it clicked into place, they could hear the furious Splicer crash up against it, beating at the thick metal and screaming profanities.

"I will find you!" he threatened one last time before silence crashed down upon the pair hidden from him.

Chell was leaning against the wall, trying desperately to catch her breath with one of her hands over her racing heart. Is that what she could expect from the other Splicers? No amount of forewarning from Wheatley could have prepared her for something like that. The body seemed normal enough, but the humanity was gone from the Splicer's eyes completely, leaving only rage and hunger…

"Ah, I should have also mentioned," Wheatley began, not looking at her, but down at her feet. "The, ah, Splicers. In addition to being aggressive, fast and strong…they're also looking to get a quick fix of ADAM. Which, thanks to that aperture plasmid, you now carry in your blood. So…well, let's not let them get that close to you again."

Chell glowered up at him, causing the core to shrink back again; her eyes cut so sharply, he was finding.

"I know, I know, I should have said something earlier, it-it just slipped my mind, that's all! My mind's so crowded with things, you know? It won't happen again, I promise."

The woman stared with a deadpan expression.

"Promise," he reassured her.

She sighed, sliding down into a seated position. Giving the door a glance, she turned her gaze down the hallway stretching out in the opposite direction. Some ways away she could see an overturned trashcan, a camera that had been torn down from the wall, and what looked like yet another crushed crate. Chell wondered if it was too late to just go back to her Relaxation room and let someone else get themselves torn to pieces trying to help this moron of a scientist escape from the facility. But the allure of freedom was too sweet and despite his shortcomings and bewildering lack of wits, she had to admit that he was growing on her.

Chell met the core's gaze and gave a nod before pointing down the hall with a questioning tilt of her head.

"Wondering what's next?" he followed her finger, shutters closing a bit in a squint. "Down this way leads to the Dining Sphere and more importantly, the Grand Testing Tower. It's kinda shaped more like a big cube but all the same, they called it a tower. That's where the test chambers are. Impressive bit of work, it can shift the chambers into any sorta order and each is directly controlled by…well, no one right now. But when GLaDOS was running things, she'd design them, construct them, and guide the test subjects through them. But ever since the Splicers knocked her offline, the Tower's been still as stone. That'll making climbing up to top all the easier! At the very tip-top of that--short-cutting through some maintenance corridors and my lab, of course--is the Sun's Ray, the bathysphere that leads up to the surface. From there we can take one of the escape vessels and set course for land!"

Closing her eyes for a moment, Chell nodded in understanding.

"Ah, that was pretty scary, huh?" he observed, a frown turning down his lips in his lab. "Here, why don't you just rest here for a few minutes and I'll wander ahead to get the Tower's power going. I'll have to divert the last energy from the Relaxation Wing, but not to worry, you were the only one left there that was, er, still alive."

She barely caught him add "I think." as he zipped down the hall on his rail, sending an implacable shiver down her spine: what had happened to everyone else?